My name is Eden, I’m 20 years old and from Wales.
I was born with a marbling pattern all over my body. It took my parents a while to find the correct diagnosis, as the doctors were unsure what had happened to my skin. After seeing a dermatological specialist in the Netherlands, I was diagnosed with cutis marmorata telangiectatica congenita (CMTC), which is a birthmark that causes a net-like pattern.
I have never known a life without my condition, but I certainly encountered the difficulty of coming to terms with my body as a young child. Meeting new people was tricky. Naturally, children are inquisitive, and I had to adjust to the habit of explaining why I look the way I do to curious individuals.
I love the way my skin changes colour depending on the weather, and I love that it looks like a sleeve of tattoos.
I used to be repeatedly asked if I had burnt myself. Occasionally, some would say I looked ‘weird’. I specifically remember an occasion in a dance class when I was 7 or 8, and another student refused to hold my hand or stand next to me. That stung a lot. However, many people were considerate, kind and complimentary of the way my skin looked, which helped me to realise that the unkind comments were not a reflection of me, but a reflection of the person who made the remark.
My parents created positive reinforcement around my skin as a young child, telling me it looked like angel kisses, and I think their words helped me to avoid seeing my uniqueness as a negative thing.
Eden has a birthmark called CMTC on her body
Of course, there were moments when all I wanted was to have perfect, unpigmented skin. I was a child actor and would feel disadvantaged and anxious about never fitting the physical requirements of the part. I remember booking a specialist session to acquire skin make-up and I would often put it on at home and see what I would look like if I covered my birthmark up.
However, something about being unauthentic really bothered me. I felt a sense of disappointment in myself. Who was I if I removed what made me unique just to ‘fit the part?’ I felt like I was lying to myself.
As I got older and more accustomed to the questions, I learned to value my uniqueness, and my condition strengthened my sense of self. I began to rephrase the negativity. I love the way my skin changes colour depending on the weather, and I love that it looks like a sleeve of tattoos. I’d like to believe this life experience has made me an empathetic and considerate individual. Countless good people in my life love me, and many never questioned my condition. It allowed me to realise that the only opinions that mattered were those of the people who valued me for who I am.
It is a key goal of mine to show beauty and strength in uniqueness.
My skin is the least important thing about me, and that view helped me to navigate growing up and find a strong sense of self in other aspects of my life. When I was around 11 years old, I discovered a passion for filmmaking, and throughout my teenage years, filmmaking became my biggest pride and joy. My self-worth as a young person became directed toward my ambition to create movies that would entertain, touch people and bring people together.
I am now in my final year at university and am directing a graduation film this year called, ‘Paper Tiger.’ It’ll be the first time that I’ve explored my condition or sense of self in any project I’ve made. I finally feel I am at a point in my life where I can tackle and unpack the themes within identity and self-acceptance. I would have loved to have seen myself positively represented on screen as a young girl, and I strive to provide that to others, so they feel empowered and understood.
Paper Tiger Synopsis
In the state of Libertas, physical conformity is enforced through a gene-modifying medication called ImmUnity.
A high-ranking official, Joe, struggles to combat the surge of resistance against the medication.
When Joe encounters Joni, an enigmatic young woman living in solitude, his growing fascination with her begins to consume him. The rebellion seizes its opportunity to combat the regime, but will Joe be brought down with it?
Paper Tiger delves into the persistent stigmatization of physical differences, highlighting how human nature often leads us to make superficial judgments based on appearance.
The film seeks to combat the mischaracterisation of individuals who defy conventional notions of “physical normality.”
By exploring the powerful influence of herd mentality, I hope that Paper Tiger offers an informed and empowering perspective on the realities of living with a visible difference.
I believe even a fictional film has the potential to shape changes in your behaviour and thinking, and I am hoping to shift the societally cultivated negative perception of difference through Paper Tiger.
It is a key goal of mine to show beauty and strength in uniqueness, and I will continue utilising my platform as a filmmaker to create stories that explore unique life experiences and misrepresented individuals.
To follow the journey of Paper Tiger….
Instagram: @papertigerbfs
